J. S. Walker's Letter (3 Feb 1862)

Camp Deas, near Springs Mill

3d Feby., 1862

My very dear Wife:

            In the absence of anything of interest, I have not written you for several days. Your last advising that Kirk was in Richmond and on a frolic gave me pain on his account, and I do earnestly hope that he will find after his said experience that even an iron will cannot sustain him and that throwing aside a dependence upon his own strength and placing it alone upon God and His help can only give him the victory over the accursed appetite.

            The only incident in my camp life worthy of record is that being Field Officer of the day on Friday last I had to ride during the day about twenty miles visiting the several outpost pickets, and after ten o’clock at night, with the rain pouring and as dark as darkness, I had to visit the lowest post alone to instruct the picket.

            By telegraph it was announced that another fleet had made its appearance in Hampton Roads, and our Generals concluded it was to attack us that night by land and water. My duty was to advise the outposts and instruct them what to do in the event of an attack. It was so dark I could not see the horse’s head, and as I had to go by circuitous routes and bridle paths through dense forests, I, of course, lost my way a little, but by the aid of a lantern which I had taken with me to light in such an emergency, I soon got on the right track, performed my duty and got back to camp at 2½ o’clock. Being well protected by water-proof wrappings, I experienced no ill effects from the ride, and tho there was apparent danger of being fired upon by our own picket mistaking me for the enemy, and some little probability of scouts of the enemy being in my way. I have never felt more secure by the fire in my library than I did, for I had the assurance that the Lord was my shield; and that His providence protected me.

            I expect Allen Lyon today and that much coveted box, which I shall enjoy, thinking of dear ones at home. You must not be disappointed if I don’t get up by the 22^nd, for the enemy hovering around our coast makes it the duty of every man to be at his post. My boys looking forward to the probability of re-enlisting from necessity, are sounding me as to my intentions as to the future. They feel dependent upon me and would willingly re-enlist under me. I read them your sensible views on the subject, as I have also done to several of our Officers, and tell them that that shall be my guide and that what Providence directs I will do. I feel my responsibility to them will cease with the year for which I enlisted them, and that then I shall be guided by such light as I have and my own convictions of the necessity of the case as to what I shall do.

            If Norman, David, Amandus should all go into the service, it will be almost absolutely necessary for one of us to be at home to look after and provide for the families of the others. If they do not go, then I must, unless a price can be raised to defend my country against ruthless invasion. I still cling to the hope that the Lord will yet deliver us in so manifest a way that we all will have to own and give Him along the glory. As a nation owned by Him in a thousand ways since these hostilities began he will not allow us to be tried beyond our capacity to endure, but will in his own good time most likely when the cloud is darkest and the fury of the tempest is at its height, speak peace and there will be a great calm.

            Kiss the dear little ones and remember me affectionately to all relations and friends.

                                    Yours ever affectionately,

                                                           

Jno. S. Walker

5^th Feby. 1862.

            Have not had an opportunity of sending this till now, and only open it to say I am very well. Nothing new. Kiss the dear children.

                                    Yours,

                                                Jno. S. Walker

J.S. Walker's Letter (29 Jan 1862)

Camp Deas, near Youngs Mill,

29^th Jany., 1862.

My very dear Wife:

            I have not written you for several days for the simple reason that I have had nothing to write about, tho I have written several members of the family. I received yours giving me your views about my continuing in the service, and they are very sensible and accord with my own. It is yet three months before my present engagement ends and “sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof”, I am willing to let it all remain in the hands of the Lord and to be directed by him. I feel that there are great issues hanging on the result of the spring months, and yet the Lord may show his power to save us from more warfare before that time. Now that the prop upon which even Christians depend, even with more hope, I fear, than they have had faith in the Almighty Power, has failed them, viz., the prospect of war between England and the United States, they may be thrown upon naked faith and the Lord may magnify his power in a way that we cannot anticipate, and bring peace out of chaos.

            But does the Christian portion of our people recognize his chastisement and bend the stiff neck in humility to his yoke, or are they, while they sue for deliverance from this scourge, like Pharaoh, holding on to their idle sins and compromising with their God? If so, they need greater affliction to be saved, now and hereafter. The Lord will help only those who help themselves, and while the bulk of the army now in the field are irreligious persons, and most of the Christians are still at home, can they hope for his blessing and deliverance while their hands hang idle at their side? Like the Israelites of old, too many are willing to be let alone to serve the present taskmaster, while if they would put forth the effort there is deliverance for them from what will prove to them worse than Egyptian bondage, if they submit now to be conquered and overcome by their enemies.

            It is a remarkable fact that the Lord has performed well his part not only in the Providential protection of our army in the day of battle, but the scourges of Pharaoh were not more marked than his interference in our behalf. He who holds the winds has loosened them, and there has not been an expedition since the fall of Sumter to this time, fitted out by our enemies, that he has not called into play his mighty agents, the winds and waves, to confound them and destroy greatly their hellish purposes against us, and yet we are unbelieving. Oh, that as a nation we could in the spirit take up the song of Moses by the side of the Red Sea and acknowledge that He and He alone hath overturned the horse and his rider, then might we hope to see the fullness of his salvation.

            My dear wife, I fear that your overestimate the amount of my good and influence for good. I have great cause of thankfulness to God for what He has done for me, while to Him I have with shamefacedness to confess what an unprofitable and sinful servant I am to Him. There is but one measure for a Christian and that is the full statue of a man in Christ Jesus. How far short of that I come, the Lord knows and in mercy spares me that I may attain unto it if I will. I follow my Saviour at too great a distance, while it is my privilege to be very near Him, aye, have Him take up his abode within my heart. Were it not that he can be touched with a feeling of our infirmities and the intercede for me, I could not hope to gain a place with him in Heaven.              I received a day or two ago the barrel with potatoes, beef, etc, which was very acceptable. The beef unfortunately had been so long on the way without brine that I had to throw it away. The time of receiving packages sent from home is so very uncertain that I would advise you not to send anything of a perishable character, some pickle and something for my sweet tooth, which does not often have its taste gratified, in the shape of preserves, if you have any would be very acceptable. Kiss the dear children for father, and remember me kindly to all, and with a prayer for his continuing protection to you all, I am.

                                                Yours ever affectionately,

                                                            Jno. S. Walker

J.S. Walker's Letter (16 Jan 1862)

Camp Deas, near Young’s Mill,

16^th Jany., 1862.

My dear Wife:

            Mr. Hardie has just come in to let me know that he starts to Richmond in the morning, and I cannot let the opportunity escape without dropping you a line, though I have just finished a communication of six pages on the reorganization of the army, which I have enclosed to Brother David to be handed to Mr. Steger, one of our representatives in the Legislature.

            There is nothing new to communicate since my last. If you see Mrs. Thompson Brown, tell her I was disappointed in getting over to see her, not being able to get a horse, and to walk was impossible. If she is not now in Richmond she will be in a few days.

            We are in statue quo [sic] and likely so to remain I think for the rest of the winter. My books will help me to pass away the long nights. I enjoy excellent health and sleep like a top in my log palace, and would be willing to live in one the rest of my life with my family around me, if I could purchase peace honourably thereby, but we must trust in the Lord, who orders all things rightly, and he will bear us through.

            Could you not send me some hominy and peas? I think Charles could cook them very well, and we have enough butter for the present. Capt. Mayo, I find, has not gone up, but will go tomorrow.

            Kiss the dear children and give love to all.

                                    Yours ever affectionately,

                                                Jno. S. Walker

J.S. Walker's Letter (15 Jan 1862)

15^th Jan., 1862.

            Since hurriedly writing the above, I find I was too late to send it, the person having gone, but another opportunity presents itself, of which I will avail myself. You had better send at the same time the books. Mayo’s steamer comes up nearly to our camp, the other by Grove Warf, which is fifteen miles off, over a very bad road, and we seldom have a chance to get things over.

            The recent snow, hail, sleet, etc., entirely blocked us up and precluded the probability of any movement until the weather and roads get better. Upon the horizon of war is the speck of peace. All things, judging from the extracts from the European and northern papers, seem to tend to an end of the war to the confusion of our enemy. It may come soon. God grant it may, for His alone will be the glory if it does. Upon the contrary the prospects may pass away, and the spirit of the evil one taking possession of the hearts of our enemies, we may have a long and bloody war. The issue as the sale moves may hang upon the prayer of a saint. Should we not then renew our strength and seek more earnestly his guidance and aid, that we will finally triumph. I have no doubt we may be saved as by fire, God’s chastisement upon the nation may be for its sin, while his purpose may be to finally give us liberty.

            The question of enlisting for another year of the war is now agitating the army in the field. I do not see my duty clearly, nor does the hand of Providence point out the course I should pursue as clearly as it did a year ago. I should ask His guidance and be governed by His direction. What do you think I should do, remain in service or give my place to others? I want your own opinion and counsel, and let me have it soon as it will have great weight with me.

            Notwithstanding the bad weather, I am very comfortable in my house, with a good fire, and my health is excellent.

                                    Your devoted husband,

                                                Jno. S. Walkter

Battle of Big Bethel

Sometime last year, I received an email from a Mr. Edward B. Hicks. He was co-authoring a book on the Battle of Big Bethel and had come across this site during his researches. He kindly asked if he could use a copy of my picture of John Stewart Walker in the book.

Well, late last year, I received a package containing a copy of the book, Battle of Big Bethel: Crucial Clash in Early Civil War Virginia by J. Michael Cobb, Edward B. Hicks, and Wythe Holt. On page 111 is a little black and white image of my ancestor, John Stewart Walker.

I haven’t had a chance to read the book, but it is now near the top of my reading pile. It appears the authors have assembled all of the available data to create the definitive account of this small battle.

I’ll give a full review once I’ve read it.

J.S. Walker's Letter (14 Jan 1862)

Camp Deas, near Young’s Mill,

14^th January, 1862.

My very dear Wife:

            I fear that my letter a day or two ago made you sick. I hope not. It was not so intended. Since writing, the fleet has sailed, and we are soon to have comparative quiet, with cold, bad weather.

            I want you to send me down anything good you can in the eating line which will keep, such as sausage, corned beef, tongue, etc. Capt. Mayo has just gone up and will be in Richmond by the time this reaches you, and he will bring down anything you have to send say hams of bacon, etc. I have had nothing fit to eat for several days.

            The officers of this Regiment gave a supper Monday night to the Field Officers of the neighboring Regiments. Gen. Magruder &c were all there. I had to go, tho I had no disposition. With the exception of a cracker and a small piece of tongue I ate nothing, and came off very soon, having no taste for anything of that kind. Thompson Brown stayed with me, having been one of our guests.

            Capt. Mayo says if you will send anything to him for me down to the dock to Lieutenant Kensey Johns that it will come all safe. David Walker will attend to it for you.

            I am writing in great hurry to send off  immediately, so excuse haste. Give love to all and kiss my dear children.

                                                Yours very affectionately,

                                                            Jno. S. Walker

J. S. Walker's Letter (8 Jan 1862)

Camp Deas, near Youngs Mills,

8^th January, 1862

My very dear Wife:

            I wrote you a few days ago that I was a little unwell. I am thankful to say that I am now well, and as these are stirring times down here, and I have no doubt a thousand rumors reach Richmond of what is doing, I again remind you not to give credence to them. It is time there is a very large fleet in Hampton Roads, and the belief of our General is that an attack is intended on this peninsular. It may be so, and if it is it may result in our defeat, for our forces, small at best, reduced by the number absent, sick, is still smaller and is so scattered that it would require hard forced marches to concentrate them at one point and repulse an attack. The enemy if they come will come in large forces and make an attack by land and water. We would have to lose all our baggage, likely burn up our winter quarters, march over very bad roads and be exposed to the inclement weather of winter. I am looking at the dark side and it is our duty to do so, while we are determined in our purpose and confident of the final issue. Should we engage the enemy, it may be that I may be killed. You have no doubt considered these things and found grace to sustain you in view of them, and I have no doubt Grace would be given you to receive the Lord’s affliction. My duty in view of such a result is to live prepared for it, and it is hard to divest oneself of the selfish feeling that death would bring relief from the trials and troubles of war. Should it be so, my hope is in Christ, and with my expiring breath, with the honest petition “Lord have mercy on me a sinner, for Jesus sake”, would be the exultant hope of a sinner saved by Grace, and my last words to my friends would be these of Job: “Behold, my witness is in heaven, and my record is on high”, and I could confidently confide my family to that good kind  Heavenly Father who knows what is best for them better than I do, and while their earthly prop would be taken away, their Heavenly support would be increased.

            Should it so happen that I should be wounded and taken prisoner, I have no doubt Grace would be given me to bear all, and that He who watcheth over me now, would not leave me comfortless, but the Saviour who now stands by me would whisper “I will not leave you comfortless, I will come to you.” As a prisoner deprived of a great many privileges I now enjoy, I would still have the glorious privilege of communion with my Heavenly Father, and with that any privation might be borne. I may be wrong in casting a gloom over your path with any such probabilities, but since they are possible, if you are sustained by the Almighty Arm, you can with Christian resignation not only contemplate them, but, thanks be to God, endure the, properly exercised thereby, it is under any circumstances preferable to us to be fortified by grace, for any and every change.

            Should I pay the forfeit of my devotion to my country with my life, I would leave my family with a meagre pittance, in the wreck of fortune, for their support, while they would have strong friends in my brother. You would have to live very economically to live at all, and I am thankful that these things would not afflict you, while the blessings of Heaven, the very absence of fortune might be and no doubt would be the best legacy, with a good name, that I could leave my children, so that my misfortunes would prove their gain. For but few who inherit fortune know the use of it, and its abuse is their eternal loss. My children would then have the opportunity of being reared, not in the lap of luxury, but the school of poverty, which tho a hard master is a very thorough teacher, and would learn them bible charity, if they properly improved it, which would be their eternal gain. But why should I pursue a strain alike painful both to you and myself. Not have talked or written you upon the subject, it is my duty to do it, and I have so little confidence in the way things are conducted in this department, that even a good cause may suffer for their mismanagement. I would not have my remarks to make you unnecessarily anxious on my account, even should we have an engagement, for after all our lives are in the hands of the Lord and He directs the battle, so let rumor go to the wind, and should the worst come, let the Lord be your shield and protection.

            Our mails are so very irregular that I have not heard from you for several days. I trust in God you are all well and do not feel anxious, since I know his Fatherly protection is yours.

            In my letter on New Years day to the dear children, I told them to thank Mrs. Hays for her acceptable present, and I repeat the same request to you. I will when we are more settled try and write to her, for every hours we are startled by false rumors of the enemy advancing, and at night are not allowed to have light.

            We hold our Company prayer meetings in our quarters every night and they are well attended and very profitable to us all, and I hope by the blessing of God may be the means of bringing some of our unpenitant members into the fold of Christ. Col. August attended the one last night and seemed pleased and profited by it. Thank God, he is living a holy life so far as the world sees, and I pray in the sight of God.

            Remember me affectionately to all our family. Let me hear of Man whenever you write, and the kind friends who inquire after me.

            And now, my dear wife, commending you to the protection of our kind Heavenly Father and renewing my request for your continued prayers for me and our cause, and with kisses for the dear children, I am

                                                Ever your husband,

                                                            Jno. S. Walker.

Should you not hear from me again for several days, attribute it to my duties and surroundings. I have to go on picket tomorrow.